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Thursday, November 08, 2007
Its over.
I finally manage to get aiai on the phone after so many calls, and our conversation went like that -
_________________________
Me: Dear what you doing now?
She: At my cousin house.
Me: Oh.. You free? Wanna meet?
She: I not free until next saturday.
Me: Can I ask you that question? The one that you told me to stop asking.
She: Just ask lor.
Me: Do you still wanna be together?
She: I don't know.
Me: Why don't you know? Is there a part of you that says no?
She: I'll tell when I know.
Me: Then how long will you take? Its like.. you don't wanna meet me, you don't wanna reply my sms, and you aren't answering my calls. I need a respond. Do I have to wait forever?
She: So its my fault lah?

Me: No.. Sorry..

Me: Are you busy now?

She: Yah.
Me: K ba.. I don't disturb you then..
She: *hung up*

Me: Haven't said finish ny "byebye"

Me: *thought about what just happened, thought about everything that had passed, thought about what mama & meimei(s) said, and thought about the people who actually care about me*

Me: *call her again*

She: Hello?
Me: Bernice, lets just be friends bah.
She: K lor. *hung up*
_________________________

You meant a lot to me,
but what am I to you?

I wanted to make you smile,
but you're avoiding me.

I wanna bring you joy,
but you aren't giving me any chances.

I wanted you to be more caring,
but you said people do change.

I told you I'd change for you cos I love you,
and you said you're willing to accept me.
If you are, why are you giving me the cold shoulder?

I know I've won your heart,
but you don't seem to bother about me.
Did I really win your heart?

You told me that I must never look at other girls,
and right from the beginning, I didn't. Because I have you.

You wanted me to inform you if I go out with other girls,
what about you?

You said you gave me chances,
where is it?
I'm blur, so I needed you to guide me.

Every time you're late, you'd use me as a cover up excuse.
Why do you contact me only when you need me?

You always said I'm your boyfriend.
Am I really?

You once told me that your friends are more important to you,
then what about me? Am I, anything to you at all?
If your answer is yes, why didn't you bother about me?
If your answer is no, why did you chose to patch?

Thanks for everything though.

~ { 3:22 PM }
my thoughts, my rants as well as my memories .